Pulp Apocalypse

Session One

Fabulous First Issue! New Mexico, United States Unoccupied Zone Army Air Corp Base, near Roswell 27 February, 2009

Futurama logo e4 acfac3 db seeklogo.comAfter attempting to run the Martian blockade of Earth, the ship of Dan Dynamo-the space-faring hero from the past-is badly damaged. With his huge Saturnian partner Titan in tow, the 1930s space man does his best to save his beloved ship. Unfortunately, the pursuing Martian drones prove too much for the Dynamic Cruiser. The ship breaks apart and its occupants begin tumbling towards the Earth! Thinking quickly, Dan straps into his Jetpack as Titan leaps towards the pursuing drones.


Blitzkrieg, the reformed Nazi speedster, is on a mission from Mount Rushmore. He is investigating a radio signal coming from somewhere in the New Mexican Desert. He notices an explosion up in the atmosphere and quickly dodges a rapidly spinning piece of debris: a tail fin.

He stands atop the crest of a hill, looking down at the remnants of Walker Air Force Base. On the far ridge, Blitzkrieg can see the several Martian tripods begin to move toward the base, their spindly legs stepping huge distances. 200px tripod with tentacles Inside the base, much is happening! Jeffrey, the protector of this small pocket of former civilization, is in the midst of herding his cows into the old ramshackle air force hangar for the night. The young man, after being hurled through one of the Tesla/Edison Chronogates into the future ten years ago, is an exceedingly capable, exceedingly effective, and exceedingly lucky herdsman. 004 cartoon cows

The hangar itself is said to be haunted by a mysterious Ghost that has been said to demand food and drink in hopes of satisfying his insatiable appetite. These stories, in fact, are true! Jeffrey is completely unaware of the Ghost’s existence—the “next step in human evolution” has managed to remain hidden for all these years.

At the same time, Stopwatch, a man out of time from ‘a’ future, has emerged from his Quantum Leap too early. Eager to learn what year it is, he is quickly interacts with the incorporeal and forever hungry ghost who is examining a control panel.

It seems that someone has accidentally turned on a homing beacon. As a consequence, the nearby Martians are investigating this signal. At the same time, warning klaxons begin blaring. Something is incoming! Just then, on the surface above, the rocket ship’s pieces crash to the ground.

On the surface, Jeffrey suddenly finds a non-mutant standing next to him. After a brief exchange, Blitzkrieg and Jeffrey decide to act against the Martians together. Simultaneously, Stopwatch and Ghost emerge on the surface to find the Martian Tripods beginning their fiendish death-ray assault on the helpless cow herd!

The heroes are able to make short work of the few walkers. Blitzkrieg’s (static?) electricity fries the circuits of one of the high-stepping destroyers, while Stopwatch opens dimensional holes to oblivion that suck armor plates and energy from the walking Aeresites. Jeffrey is luckily able to avoid the same fate as his cows: disintegration! Indeed, this young warrior is quite lucky indeed. The mind-powered Ghost latches onto the sentience of the Martians and wrenches its mind into obedience!

Just then, however, an even larger Martian walker steps into the open air field. On the underbelly of the colossal Martian walker, an iris opens and a blue laser begins to bore down into the ground towards the hidden Chronogate below!

Up in the air, Dan Dynamo makes short work of the first drone with his strong Fist of Justice. Titan, on the other hand, despite his large stature, has a bit of trouble destroying the drone he’s grappled. Eventually, the last son of Saturn is able to disable the Martian drone. Using teamwork, Dan Dynamo guides Titan down toward the huge walker. With their combined power, Titan slams into the walker, damaging it allowing Dan to finish it off with a mighty punch! Jeffrey is miraculously unhurt from the explosion! Titan, on the other hand, was knocked unconscious after crashing into the giant Martian Borer.

Now that the threat has been defeated, the odd assortment of heroes finally introduce themselves. Many questions stand before this new group of allies: Were the Martian walkers boring into the earth looking for something specific, or just investigating the signal? What does the Titan actually look like? Why does Jeffrey refuse to be called Jeff? Are there any Cows left in the herd?

Find out next time in Issue 2: Shadows of the Past Nazis, Martians, and Insects? Oh my!



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